Years ago, when H (Small) was a tiny baby, or perhaps even before, I saw an article on parenting and a response to it that has stuck with our family ever since. I cannot remember who wrote the article or the response, but it has become engrained into our family.
The article was staying that when you allow a toddler to sleep in your bed he feels powerful - he is physically in between you and your partner - so he feels he is between you emotionally too.
The response said something to the effect of: I'm looking at my child, lying between his parents, and can see how powerful he feels. Either that or he feels safe and is asleep. One or the other, it's hard to tell!
This has become a standing joke between my husband and I, when we are aware we are parenting away from the norm. One of us will pipe up with "I'm sure H feels really powerful in the relationship right now" and be greeted with "Or he's asleep, one or the other!"